Nirvana yoga

10 THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE A BADASS WOMAN

In tribute to the International Women’s Day this month, I thought I’d put my recent bouncing thoughts to words as a form of reminder to my fellow females to stay amazing or an encouragement to those who are striving to be. So here’s my two cents’ worth of list of things I gathered from my thirty years of life.

1. DELETE THE WORD “PERFECT” FROM YOUR DICTIONARY

If you are looking for the perfect career, perfect life partner, perfect home or a perfect life, you are already in trouble. Nothing, I repeat, nothing, can ever guarantee you perfection. Know that nothing is ever permanent. Nothing is ever consistent. The only thing that is consistent is change. Let go. Instead of holding onto perfection, look at pros and cons and weigh them out. Nothing or no one will have only good things or qualities. You need to know what positives are worthy and important to you in order to accept negatives. Extreme perfectionism is rigidity and hence, a weakness and a hindrance.

2. JUST GET YOUR ASS IN A SEXY GYM WEAR.

Trust me. Getting your ass in a really hot set of active wear is already 50% of the work done to get that fitness motivation. That strappy supportive sports bra and fitted yoga leggings… I mean is it just me or do you guys also feel fitter automatically after putting them on? Our posture improves, our tummy tucks itself in, we radiate more confidence. We also seem to gain the respect of strangers because to them you have already put in that effort to get yourself fit by simply being in workout wear. Also once you have already put them on, you might as well do the actual working out, right? So put on that yoga outfit and conquer the world.

3. MAKE SKINCARE YOUR RELIGION FOR JUST 10 MINS EVERY DAY

I only truly started giving my skin what it needs recently and realised what just 10 mins of effort every day can do to get a healthy, glowing skin and hence a beautiful you. Every one needs something different for their skin, it’s all subjective. Some have issues with acne, pigmentation, dry skin, scars etc. Really take the time to ask the dermatologists in skin-care shops and tell them what your skin is “facing” problems with. Listen to their recommendations. And then, do not buy them. Instead go back home and do all your research, look at reviews, look at how the product actually does the work on your skin to be convinced before spending that money on them. Also get subscriptions to that brand to keep a look out for when they are having sales. So you know when to buy them. You’re welcome.Once you have gotten the skincare products, make sure you place them at a spot in your room you cannot miss. I have a small basket of all my tubes and bottles on my bed next to me. So I have no excuse to skip my self-care routine for the day. If need be, put them in smaller bottles/container and place them in more than one place, could be on your dressing table, the bathroom where you look at the mirror or even in your handbag so you won’t forget and hence get lazy to apply them regularly.

4. SET BOUNDARIES

There are innumerous women who have spent their entire lives not knowing what their boundaries, who are spending their days putting other peoples’ needs as their priorities, women who actually feel guilty if God-forbid, they spent half an hour on doing something only for themselves. You need boundaries in life to create a very essential and often overlooked balance in your life.

How to to set boundaries? First start with defining what boundaries even mean to you. What do you want to do, hear or see that does not make you uncomfortable, or deviates from your wishes or goals? Decide limits, what you will and will not tolerate? Where to draw that line? And then put this across to people in a polite manner and observe their behaviour. If they are unhappy with you creating boundaries, these are people you could probably do better without because people who love you would never wish to hurt you.

Also, very importantly, have the courage to be disliked. You don’t need to be everyone’s cup of tea.

5. DON’T SAY “NO” TO ADVENTURE

I’ll keep this concise. It is because you only live once. Try new things. Try everything. Live holistically. Take chances. Tap onto things you usually would not try. Step out of your comfort zone. Also it gives you a sense of accomplishment of acquiring a new skill or learning something new, doesn’t it? Secondly, people are always attracted to a sporting, fearless woman, even though she may know she would fail at the attempts. It shows she doesn’t take herself too seriously and is ok with failing.

How to to set boundaries? First start with defining what boundaries even mean to you. What do you want to do, hear or see that does not make you uncomfortable, or deviates from your wishes or goals? Decide limits, what you will and will not tolerate? Where to draw that line? And then put this across to people in a polite manner and observe their behaviour. If they are unhappy with you creating boundaries, these are people you could probably do better without because people who love you would never wish to hurt you.

Also, very importantly, have the courage to be disliked. You don’t need to be everyone’s cup of tea.

6. GO COMMANDO

I used to do this out of rebellion. Later on I realised what a revolutionary change it was. LOL. For those of you who do not know the term “Going commando”, well it basically means skip the panties. Not only does it feel liberating but also it is a science for a healthier vagina. Airing it is essential every once in a while. It helps with odour and getting its healthy colour back.

How to to set boundaries? First start with defining what boundaries even mean to you. What do you want to do, hear or see that does not make you uncomfortable, or deviates from your wishes or goals? Decide limits, what you will and will not tolerate? Where to draw that line? And then put this across to people in a polite manner and observe their behaviour. If they are unhappy with you creating boundaries, these are people you could probably do better without because people who love you would never wish to hurt you.

Also, very importantly, have the courage to be disliked. You don’t need to be everyone’s cup of tea.

7. TRAVEL SOLO

I was doing a road trip from Auckland to Cape Reinga which is the northern tip of New Zealand. Along my way I met a girl.

 

She asked me, “Why alone though?”

I replied, “Because I am enough”.

To this she replied, “Amen”.

When you travel alone, you help yourself navigate around unknown places, help yourself with problem-solving, you learn to be independent. You learn that you do not need someone’s company to make you happy. You can achieve happiness within you. You train yourself in self-sufficiency. Also when you travel alone, you wander into the unknown. And the lost is where the interesting is found. It is very empowering and liberating to travel solo. Lots of people question the insanity of it to me. Maybe our definition of happiness differ. Maybe the seek happiness only in the company of others.

How to to set boundaries? First start with defining what boundaries even mean to you. What do you want to do, hear or see that does not make you uncomfortable, or deviates from your wishes or goals? Decide limits, what you will and will not tolerate? Where to draw that line? And then put this across to people in a polite manner and observe their behaviour. If they are unhappy with you creating boundaries, these are people you could probably do better without because people who love you would never wish to hurt you.

Also, very importantly, have the courage to be disliked. You don’t need to be everyone’s cup of tea.

 

Tips for travelling would be to take up and enjoy the finer things in life that cost little to nothing. Go for hikes, camp out and cut cost on hotels. Walk instead of taxi. Enjoy free beaches. Join free apps like Couch surfing or MeetUp because you would meet genuine, helpful locals who can really give you tips on the authentic way to explore the city.

8. KNOW THAT A MAN/WOMAN WILL NOT MAKE YOU HAPPY. THEY COULD ONLY MAKE YOU HAPPIER.

In simple words, if you are not happy being single, you won’t be happy being taken. Because no man or woman can give you happiness. This is why this point follows right after my travel solo tip in support. Do not seek love or a partner to complete you. They should add on some value to your life that is worth not being single anymore. Also, this is purely my advice in order to stay practical, do not revolve your life around them entirely. See them as a part of that life. This is so that you have your own purpose and if things do not work out with this person you would have not lost your identity.

Also very importantly, I cannot over-emphasize to always remember to know your worth. Your value as a woman does not decrease if a man does not want you. His love is not exponential to the amazing woman that you are. If they tell you that something in you is lacking, know that you are more amazing in other things. Again, this proves my very first point of letting go perfection.

I am not afraid to eat alone because I know what I bring to the table.

9. GET A FREAKING DIARY

I cannot stress the importance of having a pen and paper next to you to keep your thoughts in check. Having a diary is mode of clarity. You see your thoughts in black and white, you put them in words or lists or doodles or diagrams or sketches. Whatever that was bouncing in your mind, you would be able to put them in boxes and organised them in front of you on paper. This helps you rationalise. You make a list of pros and cons and suddenly everything seems clearer and you get answers to what you did not even know the question of.

10. REALLY LISTEN TO YOUR GUT

I absolutely believe in intuitions. A lot of times we hear the voice inside giving us signs but we ignore it. We really need to listen to what our gut is telling us. And not just the excitement of it. It is really necessary for us to be receptive to our thoughts. And in order to do this we have to find the time and space to disconnect. When you find yourself going through something intense, whether at work or a relationship, pause, detach yourself from your surroundings, go into a different environment, for a walk or run, get away for the weekend, to really dwell deep into what your thoughts are telling you. And don’t forget to take action about it.

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